celebrity

Man Finds Fetty Wap’s Missing Eye Playing Pokemon Go

“This nigga eye rarer than any Pokemon”

Said Jeffrey Hemps an avid Pokemon Go player.

A New Jersey man says he found Fetty Wap’s eye while searching for a very rare Pokemon over the weekend.

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“I’m just hoping the nigga throw me some of that Trap Queen money or I’ll be forced to flip this bitch on eBay.” – Jeffrey

Jeffrey says he’s not trying to break Fetty’s pockets, but if he doesn’t pay up he’ll die with one eye.

Young Thug Autographs Fans Penis

“I’m never washing this thing again”

Said a very flambouyant male fan of rapper Young thug after he autographed his man part.

Young Thug signed his name on a fans penis during a meet and greet after a Los Angeles concert Sunday night.

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Birdman Willing to Pay Lil Wayne If He Agrees to Give Him One Last Kiss

“Tell Weezy I want tree kisses. Not one. Tree”

Said Birdman about his non-biological son Lil Wayne.

Rapper Birdman has agreed to pay Lil Wayne if the Young Money boss gives him just one last kiss.

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Young M.A. Makes it Rain D1ldos in Atlanta Strip Club

“One b*tch caught a d1ldo to the eye, and is thinking about suing, but other than that everybody had a good time”

Up, and coming female male chauvinist Young M.A. put on a display in Atlanta’s Magic City when she made it rain male strap on parts to some of her favorite songs

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“It was atleast 1,000 d1ldos in the air at the same. damn. time. **future voice”

Young M.A. says she made one s3x shop owner very rich after dropping $30,000 on d1ldos for her gentlemen’s club night out.

Meek Mill Throws His Wave Brush at Club DJ for Playing The Game’s ‘Pest Control’

“he was riding The Game’s d**k so hard the nigga probably bussed a nut” – Meek Mill

Meek Mill was escorted out of a Los Angeles club after he threw his wave brush at the house DJ after he played The Game’s ‘Pest Control’ back to back.

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“That n*gga seen me in the club. I know he heard me screaming one of my verses for some fans” – Meek Mill

Many are saying Meek Mill is probably already over the altercation as he is probably face first in Nicki’s b00ty somewhere by now.

19 Yr Old Breaks Up with R. Kelly After He Refused to Piss on Her

“I told her I’m not like that anymore”

Said a 50 year old R. Kelly dressed in blue jean overall.

R. Kelly said him and his new 19 Year old girlfriend broke after he refuse to piss on her before having sex and she felt as if Kells didn’t like her as much as all the other underage women he’s dated.
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“I thought she wanted me for my money, but she actually wanted that drip, drip, drip. I hate when that happens.” – R. Kelly

R. Kelly says he actually would’ve pissed on her, but he had smoked so much weed his bladder was dried out.

Young M.A. Masturbates to Nicki Minaj Twerk Video on Stage During Concert

“That ass fake, but that p****y real”

Said Young M.A. to over 5,000 fans at her New Jersey concert as she masturbated to Nicki Minaj’s infamous twerk video.

According to fans of Young M.A. the New York rapper masturbated to Nicki Minaj’s twerk video while confessing her love for Meek’s career saver/girlfriend.
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“That ass stiff, but I’m sure that kitty flexible.” – Young M.A.

Young M.A. says she just wants one night with Nicki, because she know Meek ain’t hittin’ that like her di1do would. “That booty had me like OOOooouu”

Stripper Dies at Mayweather Mansion After Drowning in Singles

“Thats like a lifeguard drowning in water. She was bad at her job.”

Said one of Mayweather’s security guards.

911 was called to Mayweather’s Las Vegas mansion after a dancer stop breathing after a flurry of ones covered her, and was found unconscious at the end of the night.

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Gucci Mane Taking Time Off Rap to Go Back to School to Get G.E.D.

“I wanna be a scientist. If I can cook coke. I’m sure I can whip up some shit that might cure aids” Said Gucci Mane

Rapper Gucci Mane announced on his snapchat that he would be taking time off from rap to go back to school and get his G.E.D.

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“I changed my health. I changed how I look. Now I want to inspire kids to put down the glock and pick up a book.”

Gucci Mane says he will be getting home schooled until he’s off house arrest and will then enroll in a local G.E.D. program that allows him to bring his gun on campus.

911 Called to Kylie’s Home After Tyga Threatened Her for Putting Him on Allowance

“I never knew being with a black guy was this expensive. I mean I’ve heard stories, but…”

Kylie Jenner’s neighbor called police to her Calabasus home in California after hearing voices raised after she put boyfriend, rapper Tyga on allowance after he went over his sneaker budget for the month.
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“Raising Tyga is starting to get expensive AF.”

Kylie says she’ll give Tyga one more chance, and the only budget she ever allows him to go over is his hairline budget, because otherwise he looks “old AF”.