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Cocaine Dealer Files Lawsuit Against Chris Brown Says Singer Owes Him $20K

“We was gonna press him, but he got that crackhead strength. So we doing shit the white man way.”

Said Ricardo Suarez a known Los Angeles cocaine dealer.

Chris Brown has $20,000 dollars worth of reasons to clean his life up as a known drug dealer has filed a lawsuit in a Los Angeles court for money owed to him from supplying the singer with ‘medicine’ according to documents.

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Zimmerman Does Mannequin Challenge of Trayvon Martin Murder

“I just wanted to join in on the social media fun” Said Zimmerman who says he is apologetic about the situation, but wants to have fun like everyone else.

George Zimmerman who was not convicted for murdering Travyon Martin in cold blood posted his own version of the Mannequin challenge on Snapchat where he relived the murder while a friend recorded it.

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“No disrespect to Trayvon’s family, but I just wanted to go viral. I got bills to pay.”

Zimmerman’s Snapchat account now has over 50,000 ignorant followers following the mannequin video.

Young Thug Makes Girlfriend’s Side Dude Suck His Penis After Catching Them in Bed Together

“He put a gun to my head and said ‘I hope you swallow'”

Said a man who was sexually assaulted by his side chick’s husband.

Randall Moreen says 26 year old rapper Young Thug put a gun to his head and made him perform felatio after catching him in bed with his wife.

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Study Shows Girls That Use Snapchat Filters 10x’s More likely to Give Head 1st Date

“They tend to be more insecure and giving you head is there way of asking ‘Do you think I’m pretty?'”

Said the lead scientist on the study.

A lead scientist at the Columbia Institute of human behavior came to the conclusion after 25 days of intensely studying women’s behavior on social app Snapchat that they are ten times more likely to give head to male suitors on the first date.
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“If you don’t have snapchat you are also 6 times less likely to get your penis sucked on the first date. So download the app, before its not trendy and they move onto something else” – Scientist

Snapchat’s founder says he’s proud to know he created an app where women love showing their ass, titties, and drunken one night stands.

Internet Prankster Contracts Herpes After Kissing Kim K’s Butt as a Prank

“Soon as my lips connected with that ass I knew something wasn’t right”

Said Luke Skybrow about deciding to kiss Kim Kardashian’s butt as a prank.

Luke Skybrow a youtube comedian tested positive for herpes one day after kissing Kim Kardashian’s butt as a prank.

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“The dress was ass cut out in the back. So there was definitely some lip on ass contact, and that’s where I f*cked up.” – Luke

Luke says he was going to sue her for millions, but she’s already gave him one gift. The gift that keeps on giving. Herpes.

Man Jumped by Family at Funeral for Saying “I’m Only Sorry She Died before I ‘Hit It’ “

“She had promised me the p*ssy on the 27th. Bih, got hit on the 23rd.”

Said Travanace Jefferson about him speaking on his girlfriend at her funeral.

Travanace spoke at his girlfriend’s funeral after she passed earlier that week and let her family know that he was only sorry she passed before he hit it.

“It was like 1 on 27, but I held my own. Did I die?” – Travanace

A Houston man was killed while attending the funeral of a woman he was dating, because he said that he was only sorry she died, before he ‘hit it’.

5 Reasons Women Are Attracted to Thugs

Its a known fact that women love a little danger and nothing says danger like a nigga that sells weed and might have the cops or the Mexican he owe for his pounds run up in his house and kill everything. Including YOU ….awe LOVE.

Here’s six reasons why women are attracted to Thugs:

1. Because they want to smoke and drink for free:

Everybody know the fastest way to a girls panties is by inviting her over for Netflix and Weed. If she can get it for free, even better. Every thug knows how to roll up some green and drink the henny.

2. Because her Daddy was abusive to her mother:

She just looking for somebody to slap her around and abuse her like her father use to do her mama. That’s all.

3. Because they Have Money

Most thugs have money not because they have great paying jobs or are entrepreneurs, but because they do dumb sh*t like rob n*ggas and flip pounds of cocaine and weed. Everyday I’m hustling.

4. Because Women Like a Little Danger

If you hold doors open for a b*tch, but will also shoot a nigga in the kneecap for trying to rob you for ya pack. You good money in a woman’s eyes.. Yousa gangsta and a gentleman.

5. What’s the 5th reason women like Thugs? (leave answer in the comments below)

Wife Divorces Husband Because He Said Her Booty Taste Better than Her Cooking

“He’d rather eat my ass than my cooking. Says it taste like I marinate my chicken in water.”

Said an Atlanta woman who claims her husband likes her butt more than her food.

An Atlanta wife filed for divorce from her husband of 23 years, because she says he’d rather eat her behind than her food.

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Preacher Arrested for Drowning His Sidechick During Baptizing Ceremony

“She was trying to f**k up a good thing. I was getting double the p***y for 32 years, then she decided to catch feelings”

A Florida preacher was arrested for attempting to drown his sidechick while baptizing her during a Sunday ceremony where bystanders realized things were going wrong after 5 minutes past, and the pastor hadn’t brought her up for air.

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N.Y. Pastor Making Millions Selling Ciroc Flavored Holy Water to Church Members

“I never met a New York person who didn’t like Ciroc its just smart business.”

Said Reverend Sunchain of New York Baptist Church.

A New York pastor is making millions of dollars selling Ciroc flavored holy water to members of his church.

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