politics

Trump Calls Bald Black Woman “Little Bill” at Campaign Rally

“Not my fault they all look alike” – Trump

Trump called a #BlackLivesMatter female protester with short hair little bill after she asked him to clarify some of his earlier statements during a campaign rally.

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“I’m just saying men are generally bald. Not women. So grow some hair or buy an amazing hairpiece like me” – Trump

Trump apologized to the woman and also offered a coupon for some fried chicken from KFC. Hot sauce sold separately.

Derrick Rose Endorses Trump After He Promises to Fix His Knee If Elected

“Its not only another chance at playing the game I love on a top level, but also another chance at being able to wake up in the morning without seeing a meme about my knee. Don’t get me wrong …they’re funny, but enough is enough”

Said Rose to an ESPN reporter.

Donald Trump promised basketball player Derrick Rose that he would pay for a foreign knee surgery that would cost an estimated $500,000 dollars and gained one of his first prominent African American backers. The surgery can only be performed in Bangkok, and Trump has assured Derrick he will pay for the surgery and also fly him out on one of his private jets.

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Trump says he tried to tell all his loyal supporters that the blacks love him, and Derrick is just a weak step in the right direction.

Trump Says Pokemon Go Should Help You Find Illegal Immigrants

“Gotta catchem all” – Trump

Said Trump about all the illegal immigrants coming into the U.S.

Trump says Pokemon Go should tweak the app to help you find illegal immigrants living within the United States.

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Trump Tweets: “Usher Not Allowed in White House with that Herpes Shit”

“Usher was invited. I read that STD story on TMZ. Now he’s UNinvited” Said our President Donald Trump after reading over celebrities invited to sing at a Christmas event at the White House.

Donald Trump says he will NOT allow singer Usher into the White House, because it sets a negative example for kids.

“Just like Usher’s positive Herpes status. I’m positive I don’t want him anywhere near the White House. On God” – Trump

Trump also said he’s never had a a sexual transmitted disease, even though he was a wild boy back in his day.

Trump Tweets “Kanye Called Me His N-Word. Told You The Blacks Love Me.”

“Told me I’m Blacker than Obama. Whatever that means”

Said one security guard present during the meet up with President Trump, and Kanye West.

Trump recalls his meeting with rapper Kanye West, and says the rapper referred to him as “my n*gga” which is a term of endearment in the African American community.

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