Man Lights Up Blunt in Courtroom After Judge Drops His Child Support

“So happy I can afford to not smoke Reggie. Loud pack here I come.”

Said Raphael Saggleton briefly before he was arrested for marijuana possession while attending court on a child support hearing.

Mr. Saggleton celebrated by putting one in the air after a rare win of a judge reducing his child support by half.

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Lil Boosie: “Flavor Flav Been Getting P*ssy Off Telling Hoes He My Father”

“I’m beating his ass on sight. Turn them dreads into a Boosie Fade”

Lil Boosie bad azz is accusing Flavor Flav of using his dope boy almost a dope head look to bag women by telling them that he is Lil Boosie’s biological father.

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Wikipedia Updates The Definition of Instagram Model to ‘Hoe’

“If she’s got booking info with no visible talent. There’s a good chance her throat, and body is for sale.”

Said one expert on social media behavior.

Wikipedia has updating the definition of ‘Instagram Model’ on there online dictionary destination to reflect the actual definition.

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Kanye Legally Changes Last Name to ‘Kardashian’, Making Him Kanye Kardashian

“This also makes him the only Kardashian that doesn’t love black cock”

Said a courthouse reporter who witnessed the whole thing go down in Los Angeles.

Rapper Kanye West according to TMZ has legally changed his last name to ‘Kardashian’ making him Kanye Kardashian, and also the only Kardashian that doesn’t like black men.

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Young M.A. Fan Hospitalized After She Threw Strap-On into Crowd Hitting Girl in Eye

“Never caught a dick to the eye. Well a plastic dick. Greatest night of my life”

Said one unfortunate Young M.A. fan after being hospitalized with a bruised cornea.

A Young M.A. fan was hospitalized during her New York show after the rapper and part time gay threw an autographed strap on into the crowd hitting one fan dead in the eye.

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Man Builds Time Machine So He Can Go Back to Kill Whoever Invented Child Support

“Maury about to be out of business n*gga”

Says Johnathan Munroe about raising $50,000 on GoFundME to build a time machine to go back in time and kill whoever invented child support.

Mr. Munroe says he only needs about $20,000 more to start ordering parts, and complete the time machine that he says will basically change baby father’s lives forever, because without meeting the mother of his 3 children he would’ve been “Bill Gates rich”.

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Over 200 Doctors Now Prescribing J. Cole’s New Album to Treat Insomnia

“Listening to it is like swallowing a whole bottle of sleeping pills without that nasty side effect called death.”

Said one North Carolina doctor who says he’s been letting his insomnia patients listen to the rappers Album.

Bryan Brenksy M.D. says he’s prescribed J. Cole’s album ‘4 Your Eyez Only’ to numerous patients who have experienced sleeplessness,and they have been instantly cured.

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Kanye Spazzes on White Fan for Asking “Ain’t You that N*gga from Blade?!?”

“Get it right! I’m Kanye West. Music God, and black leader.”

Said Kanye to a fan while visiting New York.

Kanye who dyed his hair blonde after leaving a mental facility earlier last week got into a brief altercation with a fan who asked the rapper “Ain’t you that n*gga from Blade” who was actually played by Wesley “What’s taxes?” Snipes.

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Trump Tweets “Kanye Called Me His N-Word. Told You The Blacks Love Me.”

“Told me I’m Blacker than Obama. Whatever that means”

Said one security guard present during the meet up with President Trump, and Kanye West.

Trump recalls his meeting with rapper Kanye West, and says the rapper referred to him as “my n*gga” which is a term of endearment in the African American community.

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Mike Jones Sentenced to 4 Months Jail for Never Paying $200K Cell Phone Bill

“281-330- Don’t call that number no’ mo”

Said Mike Jones jokingly when revealing he reached a settlement with cell phone provider Sprint.

Mike Jones will serve four months in jail plus pay a $5,000 fine for defaulting on an agreement made with Sprint over 10 years ago.

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